"What does 50 years difference make when one considers the age of the universe?"
Patrick Moore was too much of an old sweetheart for that one to fly but perhaps one day Cary Grant will burst forth from the grave, whisk me up the Greenwich Observatory and say something similar. Then he'll caveat it by admitting that he's 80 years older and 25 years deader than me and was actually gay.
LAZINESS, I leave you. That's not the name of the track, that is what's happening right now in real life to this post. I'm having a Karl Lagerfeld moment. Watch the video. Listen to the music. Stop eating unless it's dreams.
The Mushroom in Christian Art and other comedically odd book titles. link
Ok this is super slow of me but here are a selection of the most powerful images of 2011, yes, from last year. link
This is some insane Borges-style shit, as a pretentious sweary wang you'd cross dinner tables to avoid might say. Autistic savant spends 20 years designing a city on paper; building an imaginary space throughout history for it. Truly extraordinary. link
In this version of the future, everyone will be walking off cliffs and into walls, plus they'll be wearing freaking Oakleys. Blargh. But a pretty interesting idea. link via @brittneybean
Tornado on the sun which IS THE SIZE OF EARTH. Way to make me feel like a microbe on a pimple on a gnat's ass. link via @copyranter
Anyone feel like a wonderfully shitty visual pun based on H from Steps? link
Ah, the tramamampoline, stalwart of the suburban garden, staple of You've Been Framed videos, now comes with 50% more fail. via @b3ta_links
Nicolas Cage. Losing. His. SHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT. Just the most enjoyable thing in the world. Think I put it in last week's links but it bears repeating. via @adamgyngell
I would like to arrive at the Montana Magica Lodge in Chile in a sleigh drawn by unicorns and then just let the sheer awesomeness take over from there. Set in a 323 square mile nature reserve in Huilo Huilo, the lodge is covered in moss and vines, spews water from its roof and is accessible from a monkey bridge, plus it's surrounded by hot-tubs carved out of hollow tree trunks. I am overwhelmed by the want to go there.
Vulgar foreign fact of the week 'The French for 'touching cloth' is "J'ai un taupe au guichet" meaning "there's a mole at the checkout."' Tweeted by @jacques_aih
Fantastic idea - using etch-a-crim software, Brian Joseph Davis creates photofits of epic literary characters from the descriptions of them in the books. link. Better Book Titles is similarly excellent (this one's my favourite) HT @matt_muir
Seals clubbing, grammatically speaking. link thanks Nasty Fat
Are you ready for Rifle Burs? It's got real gunshots as the bass. link thank you Adam Buxton. That video should inspire you to use this, the Straight Thug app.
Ye olde swearing dictionary. Learn about Beard Splitters, Bear Gardens and Bingo Morts. If you have more time than me, you might even get past 'B'. link via @lettersofnote
Eric Pillot's heartbreaking black and white shots of animals in zoos. link
Mike Tyson + pigeons = UMMMMM, WHAT? NO. link via @baldinbillboard
'Shitstorm' voted most popular contribution to the German language in 2011. link
Niiiiiice. Sony hiked prices of Whitney Houston's music online 30 minutes after her death. link
Do you know what an 'exquisite corpse experiment' is? Neither did I but now I know and IDEOLabs' one is rather wonderful. link
A car review / love story of the wonderous Mercerdes Gullwing for people who don't like car reviews by @dysonology. link
Air-baggin' - it's the new something. Sorry, ran out of steam. link
So, as I have mentioned boringly before, I been out, about, upsidedown, insideout and all around. And I don't think it's over yet but there's NO EXCUSE for neglecting Friday links, so here is a bumper crop of linkage. It's not going to be pretty but it'll get the job done.
Let's kick off with Rhett & Link; they make fucking fun videos. I want their lives. Dope Zebra is their latest and it has the best cameo everrrrrr:
Most of the internet seems to be obsessed with typography. I like it, it's nice but I don't want to lick its face and take it home to meet my folks the way the majority of the internet wants to. That said, Arnie One Liners as typography is getting much closer to marriage material than joining the crowds jerking off over Helvetica. (On that note check out this blog of Brazilian signs photoshopped with Helvetica. Sheer douchery.)